Many times readers email me and ask, “Why won’t me ex-boyfriend talk to me??”
It’s a frustrating experience, that’s for sure… especially if he’ll LOOK at you in social situations, but won’t TALK to you. It sucks to feel ignored, doesn’t it?
So what should you do?
If you’ve been texting him and it’s not working…
There are two unique scenarios here that all the start the “what should you do” plan with YOU.
What do YOU want from your ex-boyfriend?
Scenario #1 – I want my ex and I to be friends
Here’s the bottom line if you want your ex-boyfriend to now just be friends – it’s cruel.
If your ex has any feelings left for you, asking him to just be friends is like pouring salt into his wound – especially if YOU broke up with him (and/or your with someone else now).
Let him move at his own pace and heal the way he needs to. This is not about you – it’s about him. Asking him to be YOUR friend requires you be his friend in return. Friends don’t hurt each other or ask for things that cause our friends to hurt.
Be a friend and back off.
Scenario #2 – My ex won’t talk to me and I want him back
This scenario is a bit trickier. You want to get back together, but he won’t even talk to you…ugh!
Saddest part is, the more you force contact with him, the more pressure he feels and the clingier he sees YOU as, so he retreats all-together.
Not a good situation at all and totally won’t lead to getting back together.
You are going to HAVE to back off and give him space.
Listen ladies, he absolutely can NOT miss you if you never go away and you’re always in his face.
And remember, it’s HIS perception of the situation that counts… If he thinks you are being clingy and pushy, you ARE being clingy and pushy.
Now might be a good time to initiate the No Contact Rule.
The No Contact Rule is NOT to be done in a manipulative way – this has nothing to do with him, but everything to do with YOU.
Starting today – right NOW – no more calling him or texting him or any kind of contact.
In short, just stop it – and stop it now.
No need to tell your ex you’re doing this – that’s just begging for attention and he’ll see it as a “threat”.
Once you cease all contact with your ex, you have pretty much turned the tables on the situation.
If your ex has ANY interest in getting back together, he will eventually reach out to contact YOU… and THAT is how it needs to be.
You want your ex to WANT to talk to you and sometimes…no, MOST of the time it’s best to let it be his decision instead of relentlessly trying to talk to him and forcing him into a corner where he wants NO contact at all with you.
BUT, if you initiate the no-contact, he is more likely to come around..and faster.
How Long Will It Take?
It’s hard to answer how long it will take for the No Contact Rule to work in your situation.
If you’ve been really trying to get his attention for months… well girl, it just might take months for him to WANT to talk to you again to even have a hope of getting back together.
While you’re waiting, learn new ways to get your ex-boyfriend back at this site.
There’s another way to get your ex-boyfriend back as well… you can text him back.